I love to read. It's no secret that I have had books for years that I haven't been able to get to because every time I hear of a new one or see one at Costco or Borders (darn those 3 for 2 deals) I pretty much buy them. It might be considered a problem, but I'm not in debt and I don't neglect my children or my life in general, but I definitely have a real aching for books.
I'm currently in the middle of one that's the first of three. The third one I picked up at Costco because it had the designation from The New York Times as the best book of the year (The Lay of the Land). I thought that might be worth reading, but when I opened it, I realized it's the third with the same character, although I can't tell if it's a series, or just the same main character. Not wanting to be left out, I promptly ordered the first two (The Sportswriter, and Independence Day) from paperbackswap.com and began reading. Shortly thereafter a dear friend suggested we read Water for Elephants, which I picked up along with Love in the Time of Cholear, and she recommended Ann Patchett, so I bought Bel Canto which was on the "buy 1 get the 2nd for 50% off" table at Borders, and I picked up another Jodi Picoult (one of my favorite contemporary authors). And my stack keeps building, but I don't have any more time in my day, darn it!!!
Then we arrive at Christmas morning. Wow! Everyone is pleased with their gifts, all three children are happy (whew!!), my husband and I each bought the other an iPod nano, totally unexpected, and then there was a book from my sister-in-law to both of us. It's called The New Kings of Nonfiction edited and introduced by Ira Glass. He hosts a show called This American Life on NPR that is one of my favorite things to listen to. I read the introduction and immediately thought, "What do I have to do to occupy everyone else in my house for the remainder of the day, so I can just read?" (By the way, the premise of the book is pieces by journalists who have empathy for their subjects and get into the story in a way that is really unique for non-fiction writers. I'm not doing it justice, but believe me, I was trapped)
As I read the introduction, Ira speaks about the authors and immediately I made a mental list to look for other things by those authors to get my hands on. So not only am I in the middle of one book, with two more to follow, then I pick up this new one and have a mental list of umpteen authors to look for the next time I'm out or online.
Could this be the source of my inability to be here, now?
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Monday, December 24, 2007
I've created a monster
My child #2 is a mystery to me in many ways, but I'm afraid I've turned him into a retailer's dream, but a parent's nightmare. A day doesn't go by that he doesn't ask to go to a store and buy something he wants.
In the past we'd go somewhere and I would buy him something, a toy, a piece of candy, a book, whatever. He would ask, and I thought to myself, "$3 (or some small amount) versus the fight if I say no . . . sure, no problem." I hated to go out with my children and always say NO when they ask for things, so I would say YES instead.
Well, that has backfired on me. Now #2 is so accustomed to buying something when we go into a store that he throws a fit, and not just whining and complaining, he goes into complete meltdown if I don't purchase something he wants. Apparently he's a creature of habit, and I think it's time to form a new one.
In the past we'd go somewhere and I would buy him something, a toy, a piece of candy, a book, whatever. He would ask, and I thought to myself, "$3 (or some small amount) versus the fight if I say no . . . sure, no problem." I hated to go out with my children and always say NO when they ask for things, so I would say YES instead.
Well, that has backfired on me. Now #2 is so accustomed to buying something when we go into a store that he throws a fit, and not just whining and complaining, he goes into complete meltdown if I don't purchase something he wants. Apparently he's a creature of habit, and I think it's time to form a new one.
Friday, December 21, 2007
Club Cards
Shopping gods, please tell me why I must have a club card in order to receive a deal on certain items in any given store.
Not only am I opposed to having a key chain full of tabs to receive discounts, but I'm opposed to every store tracking my purchases. I feel like they're following me around the store, looking over my shoulder as I shop and I don't like it.
I don't think it's fair that in order to get a deal, I have to give the store all my information and swipe my card (or input my phone number) every time I shop. They don't turn away people at the door, so why can't they just give everyone the sale price?
I certainly have the power of the purse, however I can't buy everything I need at Trader Joe's, or the neighborhood grocery store, selection is just limited. I also shop at Costco, which my husband thinks is the ultimate "club card" that I'm rebelling against. But I disagree and here's why: in order to shop there, I must pay the fee to become a member. They don't let anyone walk in the door, load their cart and then say, "Do you have a club card? Oh, sorry, you'll have to leave now." While they probably track my spending, they don't send me coupons tailored to what I buy regularly. Some people see the special coupons as a favor, I see it as Big Brother watching over me, or trying to steer me in certain directions.
My solution . . . every time I shop at a grocery store that offers club savings, I arrive at the register and the checker inevitably asks if I have a club card, to which I respond, "no." They will either swipe one they have at the register, or ask me if I want one. If the latter occurs, I say sure, walk out of the store and promptly dump it in the trash.
I haven't figured out how much money I'm wasting for the huge corporation every time I throw their card away, but I do recognize this as a flaw in my plan. I don't want to waste resources, so maybe next time I'll recycle the card.
Not only am I opposed to having a key chain full of tabs to receive discounts, but I'm opposed to every store tracking my purchases. I feel like they're following me around the store, looking over my shoulder as I shop and I don't like it.
I don't think it's fair that in order to get a deal, I have to give the store all my information and swipe my card (or input my phone number) every time I shop. They don't turn away people at the door, so why can't they just give everyone the sale price?
I certainly have the power of the purse, however I can't buy everything I need at Trader Joe's, or the neighborhood grocery store, selection is just limited. I also shop at Costco, which my husband thinks is the ultimate "club card" that I'm rebelling against. But I disagree and here's why: in order to shop there, I must pay the fee to become a member. They don't let anyone walk in the door, load their cart and then say, "Do you have a club card? Oh, sorry, you'll have to leave now." While they probably track my spending, they don't send me coupons tailored to what I buy regularly. Some people see the special coupons as a favor, I see it as Big Brother watching over me, or trying to steer me in certain directions.
My solution . . . every time I shop at a grocery store that offers club savings, I arrive at the register and the checker inevitably asks if I have a club card, to which I respond, "no." They will either swipe one they have at the register, or ask me if I want one. If the latter occurs, I say sure, walk out of the store and promptly dump it in the trash.
I haven't figured out how much money I'm wasting for the huge corporation every time I throw their card away, but I do recognize this as a flaw in my plan. I don't want to waste resources, so maybe next time I'll recycle the card.
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Christmas cards, newsletters and the like
As long as we've had children, we've sent a Christmas photo and a letter or a card. I like the opportunity to reflect on our year and share some highlights with 100 of our closest friends and family. I love reading the letters as they pour in during the month of December. Since we have lived in three different states during our married life, we have made many friends, and Christmas letters seems to be our only way of keeping up with many of them. So I do it.
My best friend from high school and college has begun sending a Valentine's letter since Christmas is too hectic for her. In one of those letters, she wrote about loving people; people who loved her, (or sucked it from her as the case may be with two young children), and it was the first letter that I didn't read and say, "Oh that's great. I'm so happy for them. Thanks for catching us up," and then proceed to toss it into our box of cards. I sat and pondered her letter, really thought about ways I can be more loving, give more people the benefit of the doubt, care more genuinely about those around me.
So last year, I decided to go for the non-traditional letter. Here it is:
Dear Family & Friends,
As I sit down to write this end of year letter, I am reminded of all the things we have accomplished as a family and individually. It’s great to have a minute to pause and reflect. I feel like those moments of reflection are few and far between because of our hectic and busy schedules. I wish that weren’t the case.
I love the mornings when we have small visitors to our bed and we can enjoy being together without rushing out the door to work or school. This happened just the other day and we headed off to explore. It was really cold, and we couldn’t find one of child #3's shoes, and child #1 & I didn’t have a proper jackets, but we were able to find some caves to explore that were protected from the wind. And the ground was mostly red sand, so it was soft enough for #3 to walk in, in only a sock (he had a shoe on his other foot). We found caves that we boosted children #1 & #2 into where they threw rocks from their perches. Husband played hide and seek with the older two while I played with #3 in the sand. We drove home, had dinner, family night and everyone went to sleep without protest.
These are the days I wish I could catalog, not to say that the accomplishments aren’t worth mentioning, but the true joys come from the days, hours, minutes when we are present with those we love. When we can see the joy that emerges from #1's face as she sings with her local singing group. Or when I steal a moment and overhear #2 say, “#1, I really like your skirt,” unprovoked and unprompted. Or when #3 wakes up in the morning and just about jumps out of his skin to see me and gives me the biggest hug. There’s nothing better than feeling his little arms around my neck.
As we begin the new year, we will each continue to do things we love (husband will go rock climbing and/or hiking early on Saturday mornings, I will run, cross stitch and read everything I can get my hands on, #1 will continue singing and doing gymnastics, #2 will try his hand at new sports, and #3 will melt everyone’s heart with his sweet personality), and the things we do because we’re human (husband will go work, I will start nursing school, #1 will continue with Kindergarten, #2 will continue in the 3s class, and #3 will still continue to melt everyone’s heart with his sweet personality).
I wish each of you time each day to stop and recognize the beautiful gifts we’re given in the people that surround us. I hope each of us can have times where we’re not running from one thing to the next, and we can take advantage of that time and enjoy the moment.
So when it was time to sit down and compose this year's letter, I read last year's, and just wanted to say "Ditto" and send out the same letter again. I still want to enjoy the people around me. I still hope I can take the time to be present in each moment I have, because I know I won't get them back. I still hope to appreciate the things I have and not take them for granted. Most of all, I wish life would slow down a little, that I didn't feel like I have to rush off to do anything, except play a game with my kids, or read them stories, and still be able to find time to do the things for me, like run, read and cross stitch.
After assembling our cards this year, I didn't have time to come up with a new letter that reflected my feelings while wording them differently. So I didn't send a letter, just a recent photo of our children in a nice card that took a long time to assemble.
Maybe I'll feel a little more creative around, oh maybe, Valentine's day.
My best friend from high school and college has begun sending a Valentine's letter since Christmas is too hectic for her. In one of those letters, she wrote about loving people; people who loved her, (or sucked it from her as the case may be with two young children), and it was the first letter that I didn't read and say, "Oh that's great. I'm so happy for them. Thanks for catching us up," and then proceed to toss it into our box of cards. I sat and pondered her letter, really thought about ways I can be more loving, give more people the benefit of the doubt, care more genuinely about those around me.
So last year, I decided to go for the non-traditional letter. Here it is:
Dear Family & Friends,
As I sit down to write this end of year letter, I am reminded of all the things we have accomplished as a family and individually. It’s great to have a minute to pause and reflect. I feel like those moments of reflection are few and far between because of our hectic and busy schedules. I wish that weren’t the case.
I love the mornings when we have small visitors to our bed and we can enjoy being together without rushing out the door to work or school. This happened just the other day and we headed off to explore. It was really cold, and we couldn’t find one of child #3's shoes, and child #1 & I didn’t have a proper jackets, but we were able to find some caves to explore that were protected from the wind. And the ground was mostly red sand, so it was soft enough for #3 to walk in, in only a sock (he had a shoe on his other foot). We found caves that we boosted children #1 & #2 into where they threw rocks from their perches. Husband played hide and seek with the older two while I played with #3 in the sand. We drove home, had dinner, family night and everyone went to sleep without protest.
These are the days I wish I could catalog, not to say that the accomplishments aren’t worth mentioning, but the true joys come from the days, hours, minutes when we are present with those we love. When we can see the joy that emerges from #1's face as she sings with her local singing group. Or when I steal a moment and overhear #2 say, “#1, I really like your skirt,” unprovoked and unprompted. Or when #3 wakes up in the morning and just about jumps out of his skin to see me and gives me the biggest hug. There’s nothing better than feeling his little arms around my neck.
As we begin the new year, we will each continue to do things we love (husband will go rock climbing and/or hiking early on Saturday mornings, I will run, cross stitch and read everything I can get my hands on, #1 will continue singing and doing gymnastics, #2 will try his hand at new sports, and #3 will melt everyone’s heart with his sweet personality), and the things we do because we’re human (husband will go work, I will start nursing school, #1 will continue with Kindergarten, #2 will continue in the 3s class, and #3 will still continue to melt everyone’s heart with his sweet personality).
I wish each of you time each day to stop and recognize the beautiful gifts we’re given in the people that surround us. I hope each of us can have times where we’re not running from one thing to the next, and we can take advantage of that time and enjoy the moment.
So when it was time to sit down and compose this year's letter, I read last year's, and just wanted to say "Ditto" and send out the same letter again. I still want to enjoy the people around me. I still hope I can take the time to be present in each moment I have, because I know I won't get them back. I still hope to appreciate the things I have and not take them for granted. Most of all, I wish life would slow down a little, that I didn't feel like I have to rush off to do anything, except play a game with my kids, or read them stories, and still be able to find time to do the things for me, like run, read and cross stitch.
After assembling our cards this year, I didn't have time to come up with a new letter that reflected my feelings while wording them differently. So I didn't send a letter, just a recent photo of our children in a nice card that took a long time to assemble.
Maybe I'll feel a little more creative around, oh maybe, Valentine's day.
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
What you might find at a Van Halen concert
Last night my husband took me to the Van Halen concert. It has been a dream of his to see the "original" Van Halen since he was about eleven, so when tickets went on sale he was poised and ready for the best available seats (which just so happened to be in the 12th row). I knew of Van Halen, prior to meeting my husband, but I am nowhere near the fan he is, but enjoyed it nonetheless.
We discussed the most recent shows we've seen: U2, Tool, and now Van Halen. U2 has an incredible light show along with Bono's political message. Tool was a little bizarre for me: disturbing images and I felt like I should have been home on my couch watching MTV because their video presentation took away from their live performance. And then Van Halen, we decided they are just a party band, no agenda.
When you're at the show, you will probably get a contact high from the four people around lighting up joints every 40 minutes. You'll probably see ladies in red bustiers, barely there leather mini skirts and five inch heals. You'll probably see Diamond Dave in skin tight leather pants gyrating all over the stage showing off his sweet bow staff skills with the mic stand. Or you might notice what I did. . .
This show featured Eddie Van Halen's son, Wolfgang, on bass guitar. Wolffie is 16. Yea! Sixteen, touring with his dad, uncle and Diamond Dave. WOW!!! The thing that came through just as loud as the sex in the lyrics, and DLR's showmanship, was Eddie's love for his son. It's not often that I see or notice a parent of a 16 year old the way I noticed them.
At one point the two were playing next to each other and went to part ways, but not before Eddie reached his arm around Wolffie's shoulder and kissed him on the head. Really!! There were other times when Eddie gave him 5 and then waited awkwardly for the return that was a little late.
There's always a point in the show where Eddie is on stage by himself. It's basically a jam session with himself interspersed with bits and pieces of songs that have been on albums. He came to 316, which is a guitar solo he wrote about/for the birth of his son, the very one that is now on stage with him. (On a sidenote, 316 is Wolffie's birthdate.) Anyway, when he started this section, he pointed to his right shoulder where his son's name is tattooed. During this part the big screen showed "EVH Wolfgang" on the guitar head, Eddie's line of guitars.
Now I know we all love our kids and show them in different ways, so I guess when you're a rock star touring around the world, you show it in front of thousands of people, because that's where you happen to be at the time. But how many of us can take our children to work and play alongside them as equals. Maybe that's what happens when your dad is a rock star.
What I didn't see was a teenager who was embarrassed by the things his dad did, but I wonder if he does. I wonder if he ever rolls his eyes when his dad asks/tells him to pick up his room because no one can see the floor through the clothes. I've seen the Osbornes, and this didn't look like that. I wonder if Eddie ever went crazy with 2 year old Wolffie because he poured milk on the table where his guitar was, or maybe he missed those times since he is a rock star.
We discussed the most recent shows we've seen: U2, Tool, and now Van Halen. U2 has an incredible light show along with Bono's political message. Tool was a little bizarre for me: disturbing images and I felt like I should have been home on my couch watching MTV because their video presentation took away from their live performance. And then Van Halen, we decided they are just a party band, no agenda.
When you're at the show, you will probably get a contact high from the four people around lighting up joints every 40 minutes. You'll probably see ladies in red bustiers, barely there leather mini skirts and five inch heals. You'll probably see Diamond Dave in skin tight leather pants gyrating all over the stage showing off his sweet bow staff skills with the mic stand. Or you might notice what I did. . .
This show featured Eddie Van Halen's son, Wolfgang, on bass guitar. Wolffie is 16. Yea! Sixteen, touring with his dad, uncle and Diamond Dave. WOW!!! The thing that came through just as loud as the sex in the lyrics, and DLR's showmanship, was Eddie's love for his son. It's not often that I see or notice a parent of a 16 year old the way I noticed them.
At one point the two were playing next to each other and went to part ways, but not before Eddie reached his arm around Wolffie's shoulder and kissed him on the head. Really!! There were other times when Eddie gave him 5 and then waited awkwardly for the return that was a little late.
There's always a point in the show where Eddie is on stage by himself. It's basically a jam session with himself interspersed with bits and pieces of songs that have been on albums. He came to 316, which is a guitar solo he wrote about/for the birth of his son, the very one that is now on stage with him. (On a sidenote, 316 is Wolffie's birthdate.) Anyway, when he started this section, he pointed to his right shoulder where his son's name is tattooed. During this part the big screen showed "EVH Wolfgang" on the guitar head, Eddie's line of guitars.
Now I know we all love our kids and show them in different ways, so I guess when you're a rock star touring around the world, you show it in front of thousands of people, because that's where you happen to be at the time. But how many of us can take our children to work and play alongside them as equals. Maybe that's what happens when your dad is a rock star.
What I didn't see was a teenager who was embarrassed by the things his dad did, but I wonder if he does. I wonder if he ever rolls his eyes when his dad asks/tells him to pick up his room because no one can see the floor through the clothes. I've seen the Osbornes, and this didn't look like that. I wonder if Eddie ever went crazy with 2 year old Wolffie because he poured milk on the table where his guitar was, or maybe he missed those times since he is a rock star.
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