Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Should I take a hint?

In preparation of our annual Christmas Soup open house on Saturday, I was wiping down the baseboards and walls in our kitchen and was reminded of my preparations for the event last year.

It was a rainy Friday morning, and I was running in between our little room in the back of our house where we keep our TV (we call it the back house). I hadn't showered or gotten out of my pajamas, but was getting the boys set up for a little auto-sitter while I enjoyed my morning routine, uninterrupted. The boys were happy, entertained and contained, so I made my way back to the house to get ready. I made my way carefully up the steps, to find the door . . . locked. Oh, that's right, I made sure to close it behind me so the rain wouldn't get in. No problem, I'll just call my hubby at work from the back house to run home and open the door. Back across the yard, pick up the phone and . . . it's off the hook in the house. CRAP!!! Now what?

Plan A: I pulled on the door handle really hard for about 15 minutes with tears (or was that rain?) streaming down my face. No luck.

Plan B: I grabbed a rock from my backyard and pounded away. Have you ever intentionally broken a window? It is a wild feeling. . . the anticipation of hearing the glass brake, your hand going through something hard that should be intact. Window eventually gave way, I was in the house, cleaned up the mess, then braced for the rest of the day. I successfully found someone to replace the glass that afternoon and everyone loved our party the next day.

Now today, hubby has a busy day at work, so he leaves early. I'm ready to leave the house at 8:35 to get #1 & #2 to school by 9. We go through the usual business of getting in the car and trying to ignore the plethora of distractions between the front door and the car. We get in and we're off . . . or so I thought. The car won't go into gear. CRAP!! I call hubby who can't get away. Now what? Thank goodness for good friends who were not too far away or too busy to add a trip to our house to pick up kids for school. Then I remembered I have been paying for Roadside Assistance on my cel phone. They arranged for a tow truck to our mechanic, and #3 and I are home for the day. Lucky for me, I bought new makeup yesterday and now feel like I can go out in public again. Urgh!!

On the bright side, I do have everything I need to make the remaining soups for our party on Saturday, and I have all the material to finish the quilt I'm making for my college roommate's baby (who is almost 2 months old now).

I'm not going to think about what adventures next year will bring.

Monday, December 1, 2008

But I wove you . . .

This is the way #3 tries to get out of doing something he doesn't want to do. He says it in this sweet little sing-song voice and cannot pronounce the L in love and it just melts your heart, kind of. But that's not what I wanted to write about . . .

One of my favorite programs is This American Life. In a nutshell, it's thought provoking, in depth journalism, with essays every so often. It's an NPR show from Chicago that is on every weekend, usually airing Friday evening. (It has also become a TV show on Showtime, although I've only seen snippets of that because we don't have that channel). This show has opened my eyes to new ideas, people, ways of looking at the world, authors, etc. I love it. I subscribe to their podcast because I can't possibly ensure that the hour the show is on each weekend (or rebroadcast for that matter) is the precise hour my children are going to be quiet, so I tune in when I'm driving/running/doing dishes, you get the picture.

Episode #293 aired on July 11, 2008 entitled A Little Bit of Knowledge.

Act 2 of the show was an excerpt of a book by Dan Savage called The Commitment. The excerpt is regarding gay marriage in 2004, and how certain members of Dan's family were in favor of he and his partner getting married, but their son was ademently opposed to the idea, while Dan & his partner weren't sure if they wanted to get married at all. But in the middle of Dan's discussion about gender issues with his son, he has this wonderful discussion about falling in love that just melted me. Here it is:

It's not a decision you get to make, I said. It's not a decision I got to make, it's a decision your heart makes.

When?

When you're older, I said. One day your heart will let you know whether you're the kind of man who falls in love with a woman or a man. There was a long silence and I thought DJ had fallen asleep. He was curled up next to me resting his head against my side and I couldn't see his face. I stayed very still.

Grandma says you're supposed to marry the person you love, DJ suddenly said. He hadn't fallen asleep, he'd just been quietly working through something.

That's right, I said. Grandma does say that, all the time.

But you love me and we're not gonna get married.

Grown up love is a special kind of love. People don't fall in that special kind of love with their sisters or their mothers or their sons. There's something in your heart that makes you go out into the world and find someone new, someone you've never met before, and that's the person you fall in love with.

Why?

Because that's how new families are made. And one day you'll meet the person you want to make a new family with and that's the person you're supposed to marry.

Why?

Because marriage is a promise that you make to that other person. A promise to stay in love with them forever. To be related forever, so that you'll always be together.

Amen, brother.